Friday, August 22, 2008

Da Brat Gets Three Years for Assault

Pioneering rapper Da Brat was today sentenced to three years in prison after being convicted of an 2007 assault on another woman.

Brat's weapon of choice was a bottle of rum (not sure if it was full, partially full, or empty, which left permanent scarring on the victim's face.

Brat entered a guilty plea so as to avoid the maximum sentencing. In addition to the three years, Brat must serve a mandatory seven years on probation and 200 hours of community service upon release.

Her 1994 debut album "Funkdafied" sold over a million copies, making her the first female rapper to ever go platinum.

If I was Da Brat I would have snitched on somebody to avoid jail time, a la T.I., the rapper who, despite having a prior felony conviction on his record, was able to get out of serving a single day in prison after being busted by Federal authorities for buying and possessing illegal weapons, including machine guns, silencers, and bulletproof vests (bulletproof vests are also illegal to possess if you have ever been convicted of a felony, like T.I. has).

Ironically both Brat and T.I. share the same age and surname while their courtroom outcomes differed drastically.

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