Saturday, June 25, 2011

Rap [Names] Is Outta Control, Vol. 3

I really have been delaying this latest installment, which provides a doozy in terms of creative, uncreative, and just plain weird and strange stage names for the latest and often not so greatest members of this unique fraternity we affectionately refer to as the rap game.

It's to the point where my eyes have almost reached a state of absolute numbness when they scan over new rap offerings spattered across the latest blogs and other music sites.

But the truly sad part is that many renowned and accomplished rappers and producers that we know and grew up with are collaborating with these said artists; and seemingly have no problem doing so.

I mean, what is Meth doing being featured on a song called Double Barrel by a rapper named Math Hoffa and produced by J. Glaze? J. Glaze? Not only does the name J. Glaze sound like it should be assigned to a gay porn star, it is also a straight up bite to Just Blaze, who also happens to ALSO be a producer. On top of that, it is YET ANOTHER pitiful example of people using a random variation of the Jay/Jae/J prefix -- as in Jay-Z -- an apparently still-flourishing trend that has spawned dozens of rap names. Are you kidding me? J. Glaze's name is so terrible that it [almost] made me forget about the extra silly name Math Hoffa, the guy who's song it is!

But just as I'm done shaking my head (pause) in equal amounts of shock and awe, along comes the name Conrizzle, a southern rapper (surprise!) who last year teamed up with legendary producer Ski Beatz -- yep, the same guy who helped craft Reasonable Doubt into the timeless classic that it remains to this day -- a move that all but provided at least a couple of nails in his musical coffin of Hiphop relevance.

And no, Ski Beatz isn't that great of a name, either, but it is at least original, where the "izzle" suffix was already done to death years ago. Once Jesse Jackson joins in on the fun -- as he did at the BET Awards a few years back -- it's time to wrap it up and move on to the next one.

Both of the above names are absolutely ridiculous, and seriously reflective of the laziness that has permeated and come to be associated with the music that currently defines and runs the rap music industry.

There are so many more examples of these sobriquets but unfortunately this is all I have time for right now. Obviously I have no choice but to increase the frequency of this type of post so as to keep up with all the Johnny-come-lately new jacks with these -- how can I put it? -- different names.

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